a mild complaint

I would just like to bring to attention the atrocity of many (but, let me emphasize on this, not all) of the attire sold at American Apparel intended for the Vancouver-based (attempting) indie consumer.

Atrocity #1:

The Disco Pant.

It's widely known that America has been declared the Fattest Country in the world, and as American Apparel is located in Downtown LA, the combination of tight-fit, high-waisted nylon spandex and even remotely chubby, hustle-inspired females is enough to make any pair of eyes gauge themselves out in utter horror. Let's be frank: not all of us are anorexic, undernourished string beans and by all means, let those who fall under that category disco-pants themselves silly, but this is quite possibly the most unflattering pair of pants in the existence of pants (although in all seriousness, this is a highly debatable question).

Atrocity #2:

Micro-Mesh Bodysuit.

Let's imagine it's Valentine's day and your sexual partner has got it into his semen-filled skull cavity that the hottest thing that could possibly surround your largest organ is a micro-mesh bodysuit. Upon sliding into this see-through garment, the purpose of transparency fails to rationalize in your thought process. The question of "if I can see through it, why am I wearing it" comes to mind. This is the exact question you should be asking yourself before spending 50$ on something you will only wear when you're too conservative to actually be naked, yet promiscuous enough to look like you are (personally, this situation doesn't often arrive enough in my life for me to waste 5 hours of labor in order to look "appropriate" for the occasion).

Atrocity #3:

Bikini Top:

In all fairness, I've most likely bought skimpier bikinis in my lifetime, but I'm not advertising the purchase of them because there have been far too many times in my life where more-than-necessary exposure has threatened to occur. Wise lessons are learnt from dumb experiences. Anyhow, I'm here to complain about the price of the smallest scrap of fabric sold out there: the bikini. Honestly, it's the smallest article of clothing you can wear yet it tends to break most budgets these days, especially because lately they've been selling the tops and bottoms separately so customers can "mix and match". I don't know about you, but I have yet to witness a bikini-sporting beach bum who has decided to step out of the social norm that far (which shouldn't seem that far, if you ask me). Now you can pay over 60$ to get a sunburn in the most uncomfortable places and have your tna pop out like a jack-in-the-box.